What Can You Say About Maggie Gallagher? How About a Haiku?

April 22, 2010

by Brian Leubitz

I was going to write about Maggie Gallagher’s departure for the National Organization against Marriage (NOM) yesterday, but yesterday, we lost a real champion for human rights. No sense tying a civil rights legend like Dorothy Height to the bigotry of NOM. Nonetheless, the news is still there, on NOM’s website, in blue, gray, red and white. Maggie is stepping down to appoint Brian Brown:

Today, the board of NOM announced that we are promoting Brian Brown, who you all know as NOM’s capable and charismatic executive director, to the position of President of NOM.

This move is in part a recognition of Brian Brown’s incredible record of achievement for the past three years in shepherding NOM’s growth, and in part a recognition of the increasing political profile we hope to build for NOM in 2010 and beyond.

But don’t worry, it’s not one of those, you won’t have me to kick around anymore kind of things. No, she’ll be around, and continuing to meddle in your relationships, in your marriages, and your families. She’s not really going anywhere, she’ll be fighting the crazy, bigoted fight for years to come.

So, what say you, who can write the best haiku for Maggie Gallagher. Here’s my entry:

Maggie, where are you?
First you try to divorce me
Now, I’ll repeal 8

So, you know how this goes, 5-7-5, with some sort of change in the middle. Any other contestants?

Filed under: Uncategorized

Rest in Peace, Dorothy Height Gay Enough?

2056105 Comments2010-04-22+21%3A39%3A40Brian+Leubitz Leave a Comment

1. Richard A. Walter (s | April 22, 2010 at 7:43 am

MagPie, go away
Let adults come out and live
In Peace and True Love
2. Richard A. Walter (s | April 22, 2010 at 7:44 am

Subscribing again. No confirmation email yet.
3. Peter Bresnan | April 22, 2010 at 7:50 am

Frosty the snowman
Said that marriage is for gays
Maggie go away.

Feeling christmasy in April. Why not. And it's the truth!
4. Ronnie | April 22, 2010 at 7:54 am

Haggie, I Love you
Love for all Americans
Equality NOW!!!!
5. Ronnie | April 22, 2010 at 7:54 am

except clowns…..<3…Ronnie
6. JonT | April 22, 2010 at 8:04 am

Happy Mags in fear
Against oppressor, revolt!
Gay marriage hostage
7. CeeVee | April 22, 2010 at 8:09 am

Prop 8 won't last long
At last Mags has left her throne
Just say no to hate
8. ashleyfmiller | April 22, 2010 at 8:17 am

Maggie Gallagher,
I can't say that we'll miss you.
Goodbye to the hate!
9. Ronnie | April 22, 2010 at 8:21 am

Oh, Happy Earth Day
Haggie G has gone away
Now Gays, um, Let's Play

<3…Ronnie
10. David Kimble | April 22, 2010 at 8:21 am

Hmm…I think we need a song…
Here's my haiku

What we need is love
Enough to fill this hated world
a million times over.

[youtube
11. Mark 'RikerBear | April 22, 2010 at 8:26 am

This World Knows Hatred
Maggie Gallagher's to Blame
Let Us Rise Above

Those good words "I Do"
Do not belong to just you
Neither does "I Do Too"

That was was fun to come up with…lol….<3…Ronnie

What you need to know:
My life is not your business.
Go mind your own now.

My loving gay friends,
Come out of the closet now;
Maggie G is gone.

It's all about love
so NOM, just get this down
don't challenge us
<3 David

oops, that one didn't work…
It's all about love,
so no, Maggie, please don't say
we didn't tell you.
<3 David

The Winter for you,
very cold and harsh to you,
is the Spring to me.

She claims to love us
Then her words lay bare her heart
Oh so many lies!

Maggie still casts stones
She gave up the driver's seat
Glass house in the back

I love my gay life,
So, Maggie please just stick it
where the sun don't shine!

<3 David

Maggie is married
her husband, invisible
Hide! From the spotlight!

Great idea Brian! This is fun

Gay is the new Black
So Maggie, get with the plan
Wear a rainbow band

hehehehe….<3…Ronnie

(O/T)

Today is the day!
Discovery or contempt,
Which one will it be?

Love's shining banner
waves always even brighter
now that Maggie's gone.

<3 David

Thanx, Ronnie, I like that one! <3 David

NOM queen abdicates
the strain of striking down rights
given to Brian

Gosh – all of these are great! <3 David

A worthy O/T

Maggie is gone…hmm
The munchkins ponder, really?
Yes, the witch is dead!

<3 David
I am sorry, I couldn't resist the Wizard of Oz today! <3 David

Too many witches!
A mighty wind is blowing.
House fell on Maggie.

Invisible man.
Could that be Maggie's husband?
Let the People vote!

Please, no house-dropping
We witches have feelings, too
Most are on your side!

ROFLMAO – thanx, Andrea, that was precious!
<3 David

Maggie Gallagher
Her life consumed by Hatred
Her husband says: Stop!

Oh yes…

Wiccans are our friends.
I should have quoted "witches."
A point well taken.

Empty lives are sad.
Maggie needs a new hobby.
Let's take her bowling!

Maggie is but one
Unlike Tiggers she is bad
God's children be free!

This is really fun
Maggie G, won't miss you much
Brian Brown, Hi hun?!

bwaaaaaa…<3…Ronnie

39. David Kimble | April 22, 2010 at 9:59 am

[youtube
40. Ronnie | April 22, 2010 at 10:01 am

You're welcome D.K.
Haiku's are really way cool
Quick drawl Jaw, that's me

heheheheeh….<3…Ronnie

Uhm… don't insult the witches

You are right! LMAOF! <3 David

Yes, wiccans are good! <3 David

Idiot woman
Steps down from her bigot throne
It is time to cheer

Party time is near
Hold up your heart and your beer
Peace, take it from here

Brian Brown takes lead,
of the hatred that is NOM.
So, is he married?

In a way I am sorry to see Maggie go. She was such an unmitigated bitch, that I think she alienated some of her own people. To actually have a decent capable person in the position makes them much more dangerous than they were with Maggie. I am not saying I liked her, just she was not as good of a foe as possible the person who will replace her. It is a shame that Maggie always shouted down people and appeared to be so rude on all the clips i saw of her. It is not like she could persuade me to change my opinion, but I never understood her opinion, only her hate of us. perhaps it is also because there was very little substance to her opinion.

BB is married
And enough kids for a band
Does not mean he's straight

bwaaaaaa….<3….Ronnie

LOL!

Oh good! Now that they are now officially in contempt of court they can file the proper appeals! It’s moving, slowly, but at least it is moving!

50. Richard A. Walter (s | April 22, 2010 at 11:45 am

Then could someone please find either the original clip from the movie of "Somewhere Over the Rainbow" by the divine Miss Judy, or a clip from Sam Harris on "Star Search" doing the same song?
51. Scott | April 22, 2010 at 11:46 am

Maggie, you've caused much pain.
For this may you be reborn!
Gay in Uganda.
52. Ronnie | April 22, 2010 at 11:49 am

I've got this one….Celtic Woman…..<3….Ronnie:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I5T6gyCPDvM
53. JonT | April 22, 2010 at 12:12 pm

Gay, in Uganda.
Must die for love. How Noble!
So, are you proud NOM?

PS: thanks Scott for the reminder
54. Kathleen | April 22, 2010 at 12:20 pm

Anyone familiar with Scribd. I uploaded a doc, but can't figure out how to retrieve it! Anyone willing to talk to me by email and help me navigate Scribd?
55. Ronnie | April 22, 2010 at 1:07 pm

Mags, What can I say?
We Laughed, We Cried, Called Names, but
Bitch good bye, …..ooooooooo K!!!!!

hehehehehehe….<3…Ronnie
56. Zander | April 22, 2010 at 1:19 pm

I close my eyes tight
and imagine our future
Now we're on our way
57. Kathleen | April 22, 2010 at 1:46 pm

I've uploaded the five documents to Scribd. I can't put more than one link in a post w/out getting hung up in moderations, so I'll do this in a series of five posts.

Doc 635: D-Is Response to April 17 Order
http://www.scribd.com/doc/30370901/Doc-635
58. Kathleen | April 22, 2010 at 1:46 pm

Doc 636: Declaration in Support of Response (doc 635) http://www.scribd.com/doc/30372904/Doc-636
59. Kathleen | April 22, 2010 at 1:47 pm

Doc 637: Plaintiffs' respond to April 17 Order http://www.scribd.com/doc/30373105/Doc-637
60. Misken | April 22, 2010 at 1:59 pm

Oh, that's my favorite one.
61. Straight Ally #3008 | April 22, 2010 at 2:11 pm

+10 for the B5 ref
62. JonT | April 22, 2010 at 2:39 pm

Thanks Kathleen! Dense and difficult, but interesting to read
63. Warner | April 22, 2010 at 3:09 pm

She scars All the Kids,
Her vitrolic bile harms,
Send her to a farm…

…fat pig!

okay, I know, the last two are additions, but I couldnt work them in. Consider them the prize at the bottom of the cereal box. In her case, the cereal is a box of SNL's 'Colon Blow"!!!!!
64. cc | April 22, 2010 at 4:13 pm

Drat!
65. Ray in MA | April 22, 2010 at 5:26 pm

Hag couldn’t comprehend
Gays can feel love and emotion
SHE is sick
66. K!r!lleXXI | April 22, 2010 at 6:25 pm

Subscribing
67. Kathleen | April 22, 2010 at 6:26 pm

UPDATE: Prop 8 Proponents’s filing with the court today states, in part,

“As directed, the parties have engaged in further conferences and negotiations, but unfortunately they have not been able to come to a resolution. … Accordingly, Proponents respectfully renew their motion to hold nonparties … in contempt for their failure to produce pursuant to this Court’s orders.”

There were a number of documents filed by all sides. I just walked in the door and need to tend to a few things. But later,I’ll read through them and report with more detail. I’ll also upload them to Scribd later, to make them available to everyone.
68. JonT | April 22, 2010 at 6:33 pm

I don’t know Carvel, I think the hate message will remain the same, it’s just going to have a more attractive ‘face’ from now on. I mean, even you straight guys out there can’t think of Mags as being really ‘attractive’. BB’s picture on the other hand, reminds me of those pseudo-cute ‘Ex Gay’ guys you keep hearing about on the intertubes

In the words of a wise man, I think Mags is thinking more along the lines of (paraphrased):

“I prefer to work in the background. The rewards are just as great, and the risk is far less.” – Ambassador Londo Mollari.
69. Andrea | April 22, 2010 at 6:50 pm

Imagine my surprise.
70. Andrea | April 22, 2010 at 6:53 pm

637: Perry's lawyers say there was nothing wrong with the discovery order in the first place, and neither ACLU/EQCA nor NOM have managed to make any case for themselves. They accuse both (but mostly ACLU) of causing superfluous delays, and remind the Court that this case is about irreparable ongoing injury to millions of Californians, not NOM and ACLU/EQCA's discovery-related pi**sing match.

Perry requests that ACLU/EQCA produce the documents or be held in contempt effective Monday or Tuesday, NOM to complete their trial record entries by next Thursday or Friday, and the record to then close so the case can move forward.
71. Andrea | April 22, 2010 at 6:54 pm

638: City and County of SF say, "We entirely agree with Perry."
72. Andrea | April 22, 2010 at 7:08 pm

639: ACLU and EQCA again demand to write their own amended discovery order. If this demand is not met, they threaten to stall the case on appeal, potentially for years. They then "blame the victim," claiming that this would be entirely Perry's fault, for not meeting their demands. They finish by trying to dictate the Judge's options to him.
73. Kathleen | April 22, 2010 at 7:09 pm

No official contempt order yet. Just the Proponents’ renewed request that they be held in contempt.
74. JonT | April 22, 2010 at 8:22 pm

Right on brother.
75. Kathleen | April 22, 2010 at 8:48 pm

Doc 638: Notice of Joinder by Plaintiff-Intervenor City and County of San Francisco to Plaintiffs’ Response to April 17, 2010 Order
http://www.scribd.com/doc/30373567/Doc-638
76. Kathleen | April 22, 2010 at 8:49 pm

Doc 639: Statement of Objectors ACLU re April 17 Order
http://www.scribd.com/doc/30373570/Doc-639
77. Kathleen | April 22, 2010 at 9:15 pm

This from Mags’s public statement, “This move is … in part a recognition of the increasing political profile we hope to build for NOM in 2010 and beyond.”

Makes me wonder whether NOM fears that Mags’s invisible non-Christian husband would become a political liability. As Sagesse suggested, I bet there’s an interesting back story here.
78. Andrea | April 22, 2010 at 9:16 pm

Thanks for posting all those documents, Kathleen!
79. Sagesse | April 22, 2010 at 10:50 pm

Slightly OT, but clever and entertaining.

[youtube
80. Ronnie | April 23, 2010 at 12:03 am

wait?!….that doesn't work…lets try again

Want to get married
sep. of Church and State, Get It?
Haters Go Away!!!!!

DuHHH!!!…..<3…Ronnie

81. Ronnie | April 23, 2010 at 12:27 am

GLEE shows us the way
Just "Like a Prayer", ALL are FREE
This is the New World!!!!

enjoy…..<3…Ronnie:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=saFlD1mAUtQ&fe…
82. Ronnie | April 23, 2010 at 12:40 am

A gift For Maggie
Hit the road Jack, Don't come back!!!
No More, No More, K?

bwaaaa….<3…Ronnie:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S6gY_3v6_pE&fe…
83. Ronnie | April 23, 2010 at 1:04 am

OMG this is hilarious…..

Posted on Advocate.com April 23, 2010
Vote on Maggie Gallagher's Future
By Julie Bolcer

As head of the antigay National Organization for Marriage, Maggie Gallagher has made a career of voting on gay people's rights. Now that Gallagher has announced she will step down, Fight Back New York wants to give people a chance to vote on her next career move with the online contest, "Maggie's Reinvention Tour."

"Though she's announced her next steps – continuing to help NOM and writing a book against marriage equality – we thought we'd give her a hand and suggest a few new career options, based on her skills and experience.   It's Maggie's Reinvention Tour! What should her next career move be?"

(me) I'm going to post the link to the survey….but here's the options….

1. Weather Woman…..why not? There's a storm coming

2. Sin Class Instructor….no not with a bike, silly!!!!

3. Undertaker…..I can't, I mean….bwaaaaaaaa
http://fightbackpac.com/maggie
84. Chas | April 23, 2010 at 1:26 am

Maggie, I'm so gay
Reaction Formation Is
Your problem not mine
85. Brian Leubitz | April 23, 2010 at 1:29 am

Ooh, I like that!
86. Bolt | April 23, 2010 at 1:32 am

Wow, these poems are very good. Here is mine:

Maggie lied, and people cried.
Children are taught it's OK to discriminate.
We have pride, and couth, on our side.
87. Ronnie | April 23, 2010 at 1:33 am

Thank you…I thought I would make it seasonal….to go with the Holiday…..lol…..<3…Ronnie
88. Andrea | April 23, 2010 at 1:49 am

635 and 636: NOM says they tried negotiating but it didn’t work out. Reiterates willingness to play by any rules as long as they’re the same rules everyone else is playing by. Requests contempt charge against ACLU and EQCA.
89. Denbeau | April 23, 2010 at 1:57 am

Haiku is far too formal for Maggie … I think a limerick is much more her style …

Maggie, the Queen of Prop 8
was told "We need you … please wait!"
She replied with a frown
"You can make do with Brown,
He's equally well trained in hate!"
90. bJason | April 23, 2010 at 2:38 am

going back to read them all in a second. Here's mine.

Look out Maggie, our
houses of love will soon fall
on you… wicked witch!

<3 Jason
91. bJason | April 23, 2010 at 2:41 am

dammit, I knew I should have read them all before posting mine (did a W.O.O. thing, too)!
92. homer | April 23, 2010 at 4:29 am

Maggie Gallagher
A footnote in someone's book
On same sex marriage
93. Lori | April 23, 2010 at 6:57 am

Now Maggie is gone,
But NOM lives on, and we must
Continue our fight.
94. Ronnie | April 23, 2010 at 6:59 am

Want to get married
Separate Church and State, Get It?
Haters Go Away!!!!!

DuHHH!!!……<3…Ronnie
95. Ronnie | April 23, 2010 at 8:05 am

crap…#2. Spin Class Instructor…….but sin works too….lol…..<3…Ronnie
96. Bolt | April 23, 2010 at 8:16 am

Excellent!
97. Bolt | April 23, 2010 at 8:36 am

Victory is ours in 5 years.
Revenge is living equally under the law.
Everybody loves everybody in America.
98. Bob | April 23, 2010 at 10:30 am

way too much attention for Maggie, it would have been better if she would have left unnoticed, an offering of silence in honor of our preparation to embrace the next face hatred takes.for us to confront
99. Carvel | April 23, 2010 at 11:29 am

If gay is the new Black, then is green still envy. We just need to get over race and sex and go with what something is and not keep comparing it to anything else. But you are right, ding, Dong, the wicked witch is gone, hopefully.
100. Regan DuCasse | April 23, 2010 at 1:36 pm

What?”

“This move is in part recognition of Brian Brown’s incredible achievements.”

WHAT ‘incredible achievements.’?

She should be embarrassed by such hyperbole, and BB lapping it up, even more so.

It’s not hard, or brave to help to maintain a culture of distrust and bigotry against an entire minority of people doing the RIGHT thing by marrying and securing their children.

It’s not an achievement, but a cowardly dodge to couch such activity in ‘protecting marriage.’

Protecting marriage would be showing lower rates of divorce, domestic violence and/or using all the funds you ask for in donations towards shelters or education for the children of divorce or domestic violence.

If your efforts, the least little bit, were directed at the improvement of REAL PEOPLE’S lives through equality and justice….or support of marriage FOR people who really WANT to be married, then I’d agree with Maggie.

But that’s not what has happened.

Incredible achievement, is accomplishing a great good for more people who otherwise haven’t had it.
You know, people like Dorothy Height, or Mildred Loving.
Mrs. Loving truly DID endure something, and fought for love and marriage in ways that were enduring and a beacon of overcoming much when things turn truly ugly and frightening.

Ms. Height, never married, but she wouldn’t have passed judgment on the committed love of gay couples as negative or unworthy of the same consideration as hetero couples who achieve it.
When champions of fear and ignorance and discrimination pat themselves on the back for a job well done, it’s at once scary and distinctive in it’s spite and cruelty.

Precisely because, for heteros, nothing, absolutely nothing is taken away from them by the equal standing of gay people in our nation.
And because without any protection, especially through marriage, gay couples are too vulnerable to the whims of the hostile.

And a true champion of what’s right, wouldn’t want that.
A truly courageous person doesn’t do it for the glory and compliments that BB and MG shower each other with.

It’s easy to take up a cause against people who are not your enemy. Not even of your ideals, or your rights.
Unless those ideals are supremacy, injustice and inequality and your rights are not to be shared with only a few in a select club of your choosing.

NOM is truly repellent, and will never be on the right side of history, let alone the right side of what’s right.
101. Chris | April 24, 2010 at 6:34 am

No offense taken,
An appropriate reply!
Elphaba was framed.
102. Lori | April 24, 2010 at 10:56 am

Winner. I don't even care that the original contest was haiku. This is just …indescribably awesome.
103. Wade MacMorrighan | April 24, 2010 at 9:22 pm

No Haiku, here; however, even though this is purely political theater (as stated, Mags *will* be there making life hell for all of us). However, given Brian’s rhetoric, he’s likely to say worse things about us than Mags did in the past!
104. JonT | April 24, 2010 at 10:50 pm

Oh, definitely. In fact, he has – google him

I look at his picture, and all I see is Ted Haggard, ‘Ex Gay’. I’ll bet there’s a similar story going on there

Been there, done that. Literally
105. Mouse | April 28, 2010 at 5:34 pm

Here you go.
Judy Garland Over the Rainbow

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